August 17, 2015 Jordan Shilling, Mental Health, Relationships

How Loss Changes You

By Jordan Shilling | Aug 17, 2015

When we are young, we have this innocence about us that pushes death and loss to the back of our minds. We think that we are unstoppable and free. We never consider the idea of loss until we lose something or someone important and close to us.

Loss can surface in many different forms, whether it is a death, a loss of a close friend, a career, or even an identity. Whichever form it comes in, it tends to be unexpected and hits hard emotionally.

In my experience, and I know in many others’, these losses tend to change our outlook on life. When we finally experience this type of loss we realize how short and precious life truly is. Our idea that we once had of being unstoppable becomes one of counting our days and appreciating our loved ones.

Yet after the immediacy of the loss wears off, we tend to forget that feeling. We forget this idea of seeing life as a blessing. We forget that each day is not promised and there is no telling when this life might come to an end. Many of us instead turn to anger over missing whoever or whatever it is that we lost. We wonder why something so heartbreaking could ever happen to us.

It is important to seek help from friends, family, and counselors in this time of grief to help guide you in the right direction. It is important to allow yourself to feel these emotions and allow yourself to grieve so that you can eventually find closure. It is also important to rely on your faith and spirituality to lead you to healing. It is easy to become angry and depressed over loss because our lives change whenever it occurs. However, remembering that you will see your loved ones again one day is the most comforting aspect of loss.

Someone once told me that when we lose a person we love, we lose a piece of our heart. However, when we finally see them again someday, our heart will be full again. So maybe we do change after loss. A piece of us is gone and we will never be the same, but we can live this life with the comfort in knowing that we will see them again.

Loss is an inevitable part of life. We cannot stop it and we cannot hide from it. It is something that must be faced head on. It may change our lives, but we can take it as one of the many things we may never understand and must instead have faith in the fact that everything happens for a reason. Our faith and the support that surrounds us is what will always lead us back in the right direction, even if we are changed forever.

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